The Supervillain Outbreak Has Begun

Which means everyone who told me I was crazy? I told you so. The first supervillain was sighted yesterday, in the middle of nowhere, Kansas, USA. And for those of you asking why your local news hasn’t been reporting of this I reply – since when does the news report anything useful? Seriously, if you want the truth don’t look to the news.

So here’s what’s going to happen. Now that the first supervillain has turned up the phenomena will quickly spread all over the planet. At first the supervillains will be concentrated near their place of origin, but don’t suppose that, because of that, the spread will be concentric. It will randomize quickly, and there’s no way to predict what areas will be hit harder than others.

It will spread very quickly. Within hours, probably. I expect by the end of this week there will be reports coming in from all over the world, and the problem will be extremely difficult to ignore. There may appear to be some pockets of the world that are villain free but attempting to move their or advertise this information will inevitably destroy it. The villains will come in, if by some strange chance they haven’t appeared already. Within a year a tenth of the world’s population will convert. Hopefully it will level out there, but it’s a fairly unpredictable process. It could be over by then, or it could drag out.  The longest supervillain attack on record was five years, so I don’t expect we’ll have to deal with this problem any longer than that.

So what can you do? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. There is no cure for the supervillains, no effective way to eliminate or cure them, and no practical defense. The best option is to simply stay out of their way and try to survive. If you’re threatened by one then do your best to kill it, but don’t go out looking for trouble. Learn to defend yourself, and your family, and then mind your own business and wait it out.

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